Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Me... Explained!

I am naughty and I am nice,
I am dumb but I am wise...

I can be sugar and I can be spice,
You think I am a fool but I have deep knowledge in my eyes...

I am quite mature but I love being immature at times,
I can stay alone but I still love to have you by my side.

I am not fussy and adjust easily, you should know I go silent when I am angry,
I get frustrated pretty quickly and get quite irritable when I am hungry!
I dance in the rains and I laugh to hide my pain,
after reading this you might think i am quite insane!

I am truthful to the core, but I lie occasionally,
I am always in control but sometimes I do act silly!

I can be selfish and I tend to be jealous,
but you see I am honest, and generally I am selfless!

I love to relax and laze around and bask in all the attention,
but when there is work, i pull up my socks and refrain from any diversion!

I am emotional,  and I am more of a giver,
but I can be practical...you know what, I am a paradox of nature!

I am not completely black and I am also not all white,
I am somewhere in between, I am Grey... yeah, that's right! (make the link people!)

I respect others but I respect myself too,
I hate no one, but I dislike quite a few!

I can take care of you and everyone else, yes that is quite true,
But I absolutely adore when a fuss is created about me by you!

Sometimes I am harsh, I am rude, I am blunt and I am straightforward,
I can't mince words and some say I am pretty good at showing the mirror!

I can be soft and I can be gentle,
I can be sane and at the same time absolutely mental!

I am a hopeless romantic and sometimes at happy endings I do cry,

but even while life has been unfair, my eyes have been dry!

I know you want to know me inside out but you dare not pry,
I am Me and I will never change, how much you will try!

Monday, August 16, 2010


Sitting by myself looking at the world go by...
day merges into night and i wonder why?
why is he running hurriedly? what's there to loose?
why can't she slow down and smell the lilies too?
everyone is running behind something or the other...
sometimes it's work and sometimes it's a spurned lover;
sometimes it's the boss yelling for no reason whatsoever...
I still don't know why the world is running continuously and stopping never.
success, money, power, or is it satisfaction...?
knowledge, peace, contentment or maybe gratification...?
is it respect and fame? or is it happiness and love?
personal gain, professional growth or maybe all of the above!
Whatever be the case, the world just passed me by...
i kept sitting and pondering why, why, why?
nothing remains the same, everything changes sometimes or other...
situations, circumstances, and even you, that's the law of nature...
then why is everyone so busy chasing that one thing that they have not...
that sometimes they even forget to appreciate what they have actually got...
life's too short and i hope the realization happens before the regret,
not to loose the present, in their race to make their future perfect.
nothing is wrong in wanting more and more and then some more...
but you already have something that you should be grateful for.

hmmm... does this make any sense whatsoever? comments welcome...

Saturday, August 7, 2010

The Truman Show... The Megha Show?! The _______________ Show?!

Recently i saw the movie - The Truman Show. Very thought provoking movie irrespective of the fact that the lead is played by funnyman Jim Carrey. now jim carrey is a brilliant actor. i love him. but i have always associated him with ace ventura and the mask. so seeing him in a drama was quite a revelation. It was that kind of a movie which doesnt leave your thoughts after it has ended. it did not have any direct social message but still it was there in my thoughts for a long time afterwards. before i start elaborating, for those of you who have not had the privilege of watching it, here is a short summary -
The movie is about a man named Truman. He is a pretty normal guy, your average guy-next-door. the only different thing about his life is that it not real. You see since Truman was a little baby he was being filmed...24 /7... and he is completely unaware about it. his life is one big reality show watched by thousands where he is the main star and he doesn't even know about it. (no, it is not like Big Boss. he is not a willing participant, instead he doesn't even know that whatever he is doing, he is saying, in short his every move is being watched by thousands of voyeurs!) Everything about him and around him is constructed... the town he lives in is a massive domed set, his parents, his friends even his wife are actors playing a part! all the people in his small town are character artists! and poor truman is living his life thinking that his world is the real world. you may ask that how is it possible? he never went out of his town? he didn't. the town is surrounded by water and the director of the show, christof, had very cleverly implanted in his mind, through various incidents in his life, a fear of  the sea. truman was also discouraged to travel by his parents and teachers as it was deemed unsafe. And when his father died by drowning in water, his fear and resolve to never leave his little haven strengthened. but, he eventually does figure out that there is something wrong about his life and after a lot of trying on his part, he manages to leave the set and finally live his life... on his own terms.

The director of the truman show ( the show in the movie and not the movie itself) was trying to play God. he orchestrated every circumstance in Truman's life. I am sure he got a kick but he didn't succeed. the world that  he created was discarded by the only person it was created for. in the end truman leaves the known for the unknown...director tells him the benefits of staying inside the dome, that the world outside is not what he expects, that truman is not ready to face it, that he will fail and come crawling back into the dome. but truman still chose to leave... only because he wanted freedom. freedom to make his own decisions, freedom to experience life as it is.

As i said, this movie really got me thinking... what if our life is just like truman's? what if we are caged inside a dome and viewed by people outside? what if everything around us is fake and the world is something entirely different? What if we are being filmed all the time? our every move, our every reaction is being recorded and being viewed my thousands of people? and then other thought came to my mind...what if the friends and family i so depend upon are just actors who are paid to be a part of my life? who are paid to laugh and cry with me? scary thought!!

and what if you indeed find out that everything around you is a sham... would you have the courage to do what truman did and step out of the dome / set? would you give up your comfort zone, something that you are familiar with for something that you have no idea about? would you take that risk? Would you step out that door?

you know we may not be living in a literal dome (thank god for that!) but all of us do have our own safe zones. the area where we are comfortable, where we know what is happening and what will happen... a place in your life that gives you that feeling of security... it doesnt have to be a place per se, it could be situations, for example, your job. you have been doing the same thing for years, you know everyone, you know your work, you know what will happen. in short you are comfortable in the daily routine. you never want to leave it... quite understandable. what's the point of trying something about which you have no idea about, what if you fail? what if you don't like it? hmm...but i believe that until and unless we take risks and leave our comfort zone we wont be able to reach anywhere. Think... if columbus hadn't left his house, america would never be discovered (granted, he thought it was India, but still the point is he took a risk!)

facing the unknown also gives you an insight into yourself, your hidden strengths, your reactions to situations over which you have no control. living life as you know is definitely easier but is it enough?

i would leave you with all these questions... do comment what do you think...

"In case I don't see you ... good afternoon, good evening, and good night."

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Past -> Present -> Future... interlinked!

A little something i wrote when i was at a not-so-good phase in life, personally and career-wise. one of those times when everythng seems to go wrong and there is no one in your life who can understand what you are going through... a very lonely time indeed. Glad i am out of it now. but, as i always say - "your past is what makes your present that shapes your future." so i believe that you should never forget your past. it has the key to your future. but that doesnt mean that you keep holding on to it like a security blanket. the biggest thing that one needs to learn is the difference between remembering the past, learning from the mistakes or cherishing the happy moments AND living in the past. the past is done and over with. you can't change it. you can't bring it back. but this same past was once your present (pretty complicated thought huh? read it again ;) ) the decisions you made in the past have an effect in your present. and what you decide today will determine your future. anyway i am not a saint. sometimes i also forget the distinction where past ends and the present begins. i also forget that past has gone and no matter how hard i try it will never come back. this hold true for the good times and the bad.

but enough of the gyaan... this is a no gyaan post. its abt me and how i felt some years back. posting those couple of lines here, so i always remember how i felt and be grateful that i have passed it.

" All i wanted were a couple of smiles, but He filled thousand tears in my eyes...
And He said to me softly, let them rain, they'll wash away all your sadness and pain...
The tears fall down hard and everything they do erase...
But they also make me realize, the world is indeed a very lonely place."

Don't believe in this anymore but at some point i did. another thing that i believe is nothing lasts forever. if the good times disappear so do the tough times. If people change, so do situations and circumstances. we just have to go on. thats life. Now, for me, that same couplet reads something like -

"All i wanted were a couple of smiles, but He filled thousand tears in my eyes...
And He said to me softly, let them rain, they'll wash away all your sadness and pain...
The tears fall down hard and everything, the hurt and the sorrow, they do erase...
your hand wipes them away and I realize, the world is not such a lonely place." :)

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