Wednesday, June 15, 2011

... And then they murdered the English language!

I have already written a post about how today's youngsters are murdering slaughtering the English language with their supposedly innovative *rolling eyes* spellings and usage. You can read it here. This post can be seen as an extension of that.

I have, in recent time, come across various blog posts by many a talented writers who have also shown their disgust with this growing phenomenon. I would not say, this post is different but it does highlight some of those innovations that irritate me to no end!

What bothers me more is that some of these "innovations" are used by, not 11-year-old kids, but by MBA graduates as well! I, who has broken up with a guy just because he couldn't speak in English properly (don't judge me! he couldn't frame a single sentence!), positively shudder at reading some of the exchanges on Facebook!

Here are some of the weirdest - (Yes, it is weird and not wierd!)
  • Congrates and congos - What is the deal with this?! what does it even mean?! I mean how long does it take to type out C-O-N-G-R-A-T-U-L-A-T-I-O-N-S! 2 seconds! If you are really happy for someone take out two seconds and type out the whole damn word. 

  • Birthday wishes. I have read some funny birthday wishes, hell i have even wished someone "appie Boithday"! But, that was in jest. There are some people who don't do it in jest. the funniest wish (or irritating) i have ever seen is some friend's friend who had typed HBD to wish my friend on his birthday! there was nothing more to the wish, just HBD. Now, HBD obviously stands for Happy Birth Day. First, HBD?! really?! I mean the least you can do is type Happy B'day (the least I said!) and second, birthday is one word. 

  • Another case in point - OMG. If you are really astonished to see something show it by typing Oh My God!

  • Misspellings. I don't understand what is the deal with intentionally spelling something wrong. why would you, after an MBA degree, spell my as mah?! or failing as phailing? is as iz?  do you think it makes you look cool? It doesn't. It makes people wonder about that MBA degree of yours! or maybe you are that dumb?!

  • Ellipsis or (...) those dots, that you use so generously, they have a purpose. they are not used to beautify text. Wikipedia defines ellipsis as "marks that usually indicate an intentional omission of a word in the original text. An ellipsis can also be used to indicate a pause in speech, an unfinished thought, or, at the end of a sentence, a trailing off into silence. When placed at the end of a sentence, the ellipsis can also inspire a feeling of melancholy longing. The ellipsis calls for a slight pause in speech." But, many people just use it for...? God knows, what they use it for! I mean there are comments with one word ::ten dots:: another word ::couple of commas:: some more words ::some more dots:: what the hell is that?! I mean if you are so keen to use ellipsis, at least use three dots! Same goes for other punctuation marks - excited or want to portray shouting, one exclamation mark is enough! asking a question - one question mark is what you need.  

  • SMS Language. Some examples - Hw r u?, m f9, Gr8, lukin gud, tc, wassup, and the list goes on and on. SMSs are cheap now (even free!), and social networking websites don't charge you on the basis of how much characters you type, so please use full words. and don't give me that crap about saving time. you are on facebook or twitter... you obviously have loads of time to pass! take out two seconds and type out the full damn word!
  • Lastly (not because I can't think of anymore but just don't want to bore you with a long list) wrong usage. there is a difference between it's and its, you're and your, they're and their. write and right are not interchangeable. the same goes for hear and here, quite and quiet, their and there. 
Now, I am no expert on English (although I think I know more than an average individual) but these are some of the things that make me positively shudder. I am sure you also have a long list of irritations induced by the misuse of English language. Please share it through comments. Let's make this an exhaustive list about How / What NOT to type!

P.S. if you find something wrong with my usage, don't hesitate to let me know.


  1. I completely agree with you. Recently OMG and LOL have been included in Oxford English dictionary. I still try to avoid using them. To me it takes same time to type the complete word as abbreviations.

  2. Well said. I have couple of young relatives who SMS me sometimes. And I have a very bad feeling for next one hour, like I at some idli-sambar that has gone bad :)

  3. Great blog. My old English teacher would love this.

  4. So true. I completely relate with this.
    The most irritating is people substituing 'Your' as 'You're' :|


  5. I would beg to differ.
    Abbreviations and SMS language: They are used to cut the time short.
    Abbreviations have been in use from ages. Eg.: "P.S.", "i.e.", "Eg.", "SMS"
    Some new additions wouldn't cause harm.

    For the rest "irritations" even i agree, they really think they'll look cool.

    I guess this is the feeling that contemporaries must have got when "Thou art not" changed to "You aren't".


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